Birthday!

This, my 29th birthday, was filled with all sorts of fun. Eric took me to Mafiaoza's, my favorite pizza place, and then to Andrew Peterson's Behold the Lamb concert. Polly Jane slept through the entire meal, allowing me to eat hot food! It was treat. She didn't sleep through the concert. As I held her and paced in the back of the Ryman, I embraced the attitude "I'm so thankful to have a baby to keep quiet right now." Who knows when my cares will no longer be "Is my baby going to cry in public?!?!" The concert, as always, was absolutely fabulous - a good addition to our attempt at celebrating Advent this year.

My birthday morning I rushed off to get the kids and arrived to a huge plate of my mother-in-law's famous Mississippi Mud. Yum! That was my favorite treat of the day. We sped along to our friend's house for a little "Happy Birthday Jesus" party. I was in charge of the craft; it left much to be desired. Haven enjoyed it though, because she was able to eat a ton of gumdrops. Alexis even sang me a solo version of Happy Birthday - pum, pum, pum.

That night we ate some delicious leftovers plus cupcakes from my favorite cupcake store, Cupcake Collection. Eric had pre-ordered to make sure I got all my favorite flavors. (What a kind husband!) Oh! My present? A peach tree, already planted and re-planted. (Cows can knock them over, you know, so don't plant it in your pasture.)

That night we began our family Christmas celebration. Our immediate family Christmas is my favorite time of the season, I believe. It's just us with just our very few presents. We eat sausage balls and sticky buns. We take forever opening things. We play. We go outside. We eat more sausage balls. It's great.

Eric built a fire and made a huge bed for all of us on the floor. We watched the beginning of Elijah's new movie, Davy Crockett.




Elijah and Eric were the only ones who lasted all night. Haven was beside herself with excitement and could NOT go to sleep. She was just so happy to be sleeping in between us. She wanted to point out all Eric's body parts ("Eyes!!! Eyes!!!! Night-night eyes!!!! Elbow!!!! Elbow!!!! Neck!!! Neck!!!! etc.) I could not stop laughing at her. She was happily put in her crib soon after that. Good thing the boys are tough or all that blanket folding would have gone to waste:)

One Thousand Gifts - A Beginning

My very favorite blogger, Ann Voskamp, started a list one day, a list of things for which she could thank God. It has changed her life. Now I am hoping it will change mine too. My brown journal sits open, begging me to fill it with a record of good gifts from my good God. Copying Ann, I'm on my way to thanking God for One Thousand Gifts.

Thanking God for (gifts 1 - 14):
~ A God to Whom I can give thanks
~ 2010, a year in which God turned hardships into amazing blessings
~ Hope! God makes all things new, even me! Perhaps this will be a year where harsh words cease to fly from my tongue?
~ Squishy cheeks on all my children
~ The joy of holding Polly Jane
~ Polly Jane's especially squishy cheeks
~ A hand-me-down couch wide enough for two of us
~ Bags and boxes and arms full of new books
~ A hundred answered prayers in the birth of my new niece
~ Being reminded that God cares about even the little things, and that He hears the prayers of His people
~ A husband who is willing to help me in all kinds of ways
~ A never-ending To Do list
~ Quiet moments...and their scarcity
~ The sermon yesterday "Fight your sin of __. And when you wonder if God could ever love someone who ___, read Judges. They sin again and again and again, YET God loves them!"



Lydia: {tucking Elijah in bed, covering him with kisses}
Elijah: "You're breath smells weird. I think you need to take a bath."

Elijah: "Haven, you're really stressing out...everytime I come near your babies, you're really stressing out."

Out of the Mouth of Babes

Me: {handing a tissue to Elijah} "Do you need to blow your nose?"
Elijah: {shaking his head} "No. I just have some crust in my nose."

Responding to Sin

Today, for the first time, I locked myself in the bathroom so I could take a quick shower. Elijah is 3 1/2 now, and - well, that probably means we should develop some rules of privacy at our house. With only one bathroom that can be tricky, but I thought I would try the locking technique and see how it went. The baby was safely tucked away; Elijah and Haven were playing independently.

I heard screaming. Not the "I want a snack and you won't give me one" scream. Not the "Elijah grabbed that toy from me" scream. A different scream. An "I'm really hurting scream." I yelled for Elijah, intending to tell him to go help Haven. Perhaps she was stuck under the chair or a book had fallen on her. Elijah didn't answer. I yelled for him louder. No answer. No noise at all from Elijah. Haven's scream continued but moved to another room. I was scared.

I grabbed a towel and ran out to find Haven. She was laying down on the living room floor. Elijah was pounding on her back as if it were a drum. Over and over. I yelled - at him. "What are you doing to your sister?!?!?" I grabbed him and threw him on his bed. I grabbed Haven to comfort her. She perked right back up, resilient little thing.

After getting dressed I had Elijah tell me what happened. "I hit Haven over and over again." "What else did you do to Haven?" "I pulled her hair over and over again." I cried. I have never cried over my children's sin. I was so sad - sad because of the wickedness in Elijah's heart. Sad because he was capable of being so mean. Sad because he would be so mean to his sister. I felt desperate. Desperate to know how to help this little boy I love so much. How can I explain to him how wicked that was? How do I tell him, in words that will pierce his hard heart, that God hates those who oppress the weak? How do I show this boy his need of a Savior?

I wonder that I have never cried over Elijah's sins before. Why do they often only stir up irritation or inconvenience rather than grief? I wonder that I do not cry over my sins. And I thank God for this brief glimpse of seeing sin as it really is - wicked, terrible, an offense to a great God.

I am freshly reminded of my need for supernatural wisdom - Biblical wisdom - in raising these children. This afternoon I read I Peter 5. How thankful I am that I can cast all my anxieties on Him (because He cares for me!). So, I cast Elijah's little heart again at the feet of Christ and plead with Him to change it...and to give me gracious guidance in responding to his sins.

Recent Verbage

Bella, crying: "I need a bow!"

Elijah: "Miles, why are you still crying? I just sang you a song."

Elijah: "If I saw a big, big spider, I could just kill him with my big, big muscles."

Lydia: "Oh, Elijah! Did you just hit Polly Jane's head?"
Elijah: {pause. looks confused.} "Oh, Mom, I just did it by purpose."
Lydia: "You mean, 'It was an accident'?"
Elijah: "Yeah. That's what I mean. You were confused."

Lydia: "Elijah, in what are we riding to go to town? Are we in a bobsled like Almanzo or a wagon like Pa?"
Elijah: "Ummm. We are in the Civil War, and we are driving in a chariot. Yep."

Elijah: "Haven, if you trust me tomorrow, I'll give you more prizes."

Haven: "OORRREE ANDY!!!" ("more candy!") "And?!?!" {holds out her hand with a charming look on her face}

Plugged...or...Why Eric Wins the "Best Husband" Award

With a few details left out, yesterday went a little like this.

Lydia: wakes up, wonders what happened last night and how many times she fed the baby, unable to raise arm, gets children breakfast, sits around praying God will give wisdom on what to do, has hard time moving, wonders what her problem is, begins to have a full body ache, confirms suspected plugged duct diagnosis, watches kids ransack the living room, watches kids jump on the couch, doesn't care, gets kids lunch, feels nauseous, puts kids down for a nap, starts witch doctor regimen*, lays down with Polly Jane, listens to Polly Jane cry, gets headache, finds it hard to move, gets Haven up early from her nap after Haven uncharacteristically wakes up crying, unsuccessfully attempts to resume nap with Haven, snaps at children, watches an hour of Disney cartoons (Elijah is thrilled), wishes husband would come home, attempts to discipline Haven, wishes husband would come home, snaps at children, feeds children dinner without vomiting, sits on couch holding a crying Polly Jane, says "I can't move. All the kids need a bath." as soon as husband walks in the door, lays in bed crying and sweating for the next three hours, wishes she could care for either her home/husband/or children, awakens to the delivery of cabbage leaves at 10 pm.

Eric: up at 4:30 AM to exercise, slaves away at work all day amidst many demands, arrives home to disaster-strewn house and distraught wife, eats dinner in four minutes, puts cats up for the night, bathes all three kids, brushes children's teeth, reads fun books to Elijah and Haven, tucks children in bed, loads dishes, picks up strewn toys, replaces couch cushions, cleans the entire house, vacuums all the floors, starts washing the cloth diapers, prays for me, runs to the grocery store, delivers cabbage leaves at 10 pm.

While these are sweet, sweet days they are also very hard days. Thankfully, these difficulties continue to drive me to the One who can provide grace to help in my time of need. Yesterday I repeatedly pleaded with God to "Give the strength to sustain me and wisdom enough to guide my hand" in between apologizing to my children. God is gracious, and today I am feeling much, much better. As in, I can move. I can eat. I even ran an errand! Isn't it amazing what 24 hours can hold? Today I read this post from my favorite blogger, cried, and was encouraged. So, today, I'll continue to seek to be thankful - for everything.

*Witch Doctor Regimen (highly recommended!) for Plugged Ducts:
- 1000 mg Vitamin C
- 2 tablets of Echinacea
- 2 capsules of odorless garlic
Take all three supplements twice a day until resolved. This has always cleared up my plugged ducts within 24 hours. Regimen courtesy of Susie Meeks, CPM.

Rock-a-Bye

Rock-a-Bye Elijah
Upstairs in our house.
When the wind blows
Your crib won't crash.
When the thunder cracks
You can just relax
'Cause our little Tooskie
Is loved to the max.

Rock-a-Bye Haven
Right where you were born.
In this cabin
Safe from the storm.
You've brought lots
Of great big pink bows,
And we love you...
Right down to your toes.

Rock-a-Bye Polly
Here in our room.
You're a treat
That came none to soon.
We're so glad
God brought you our way;
And we're thankful
You're here to stay.

{Please excuse my attempt at poetry, but - to us - these little rhymes represent lots of rocking, crying, sleeplessness, and love.}